Although interracial dating is slowly picking up, the society is yet to integrate such partners fully. When an African, for example, begins to date a white lady, the general opinion of the public about you will change. When you visit the public social gatherings, the way people look at you and the comments gives you a clue on what their opinion about you is.
Black men dating white women, therefore, do face a lot of challenges including the following:
1. Being viewed as an outsider
When you are dating or marry from another race, looks at you differently. Beginning from children to adults, you get undue attention. Their looks tell you that you have gone against the society’s expectation. In most African settings, when you start to date a white man people become extra attentive to you. Your presence in any gathering causes unrest. You begin to command some special treatment. Everything about you ceases to be normal just because you are walking with someone in a white skin. You are highly noticeable.
2. You have to be prepared to receive offensive statements and jokes
If you happen to find love from someone who is not of your race, prepare to receive negative comments from the public. Many people still oppose mixed race dating and won’t keep silent about it. Most will think that you are simply after his white skin. Yet other people would dare to question you publicly; do you intend to marry her? Does she speak our language? Wherever such a couple pass, people are more socially aware of them; there is more whispering and giggling. The negative comments from the public if left unchecked can make such couple to start avoiding the public scene.
3. Being considered to have rebelled from the family norms
One of the significant difficulties for black men dating white women is lack of acceptance by family members. It isn’t so bad to be rejected by friends on account of marrying from another race. But to have your spouse being openly unwanted by your immediate family is traumatizing. In extreme cases fathers even disown their children due to interracial dating, such kids are assumed to have rebelled.
4. Unfair treatment of your offspring by their peers
One of greatest challenges of cross race dating becomes visible when children come into the picture. Offspring from such a setting are very mush easy to distinguish. Just like adults also look down upon those from other races amidst them, children also behave likewise. For instance a black woman gets married to a white man and they have kids. Most their children will get unfair treatment by their fellow white children.
At the same time, people may start question your kids if they are really your. With mixed race marriage, your children will acquire their identity from both traces. Thereby giving rise to blue, green or brown eyes.
5. Very few accepting that there is genuine affection between you
You might have real love for your Asian girl. But the public view for black people dating white people is that one party is simply joy riding the other. In fact, if it’s a black woman with a white, prosperous man; the prevailing opinion will be that you are simply after his wealth. You will find it difficult to convince the public that you are genuinely in love. To most people, it will simply be a matter of time before the two of you part ways.
6. Endless questions and wild guesses about your partner’s identity
When you start to date from another race, everyone becomes extra attentive about your mate’s racial back ground. Some people may tactlessly attack you with the question; who is he, where does he come from? To those who are clue less of his race, they may make a probe with many annoying guesses. Hence you will have to give details of his background now and then, which is quite annoying.
7. Living in Isolation
In some cases venturing into an interracial relationship is viewed as having gone against the society’s expectation. For example, when you live in small towns, those who are against such may even attempt to force you to flee to other areas. Others will just refrain from associating with you. Your circle of friends may then reduce hence living in isolation.
8. More like co-workers than couple
In most cases, many people will mistake him as a work colleague. In fact, it wouldn’t surprise to find someone hit on you next to your partner, especially when you are silently sited close to each other. To them, the probability that you could be a couple is very unlikely. How would you feel to hear another man trying to seduce your girlfriend right next to you?
In addition to the usual relationship problems, interracial dating has additional challenges.